My Life As A Sex Worker

My first blog post!

I wanted to start this blog as a way for you to get to know me better. And what better way to start than answering some of the most common questions I get!

I started sex work about 6 years ago. A friend of mine mentioned she had started and the idea of it was just thrilling to me. I wanted to know every juicy detail. It wasn't long after I had signed myself up for some websites and was knocking on the door (hands shaking and heart beating out of my chest!) of my first clients hotel room door. Since that day I haven't looked back and willingly threw myself into the industry.

What made me want to start? Well, I was recently split up with my long term partner. I was definitely in my "slut phase" having never really been single in my adult life. I was on tinder every night of the week. And boy was I HORNY! I figured, I'm doing this for free already, maybe I can have fun and get paid for it. So why not jump off the cliff and find out?

I wasted a lot of time on sugar baby websites, being taken advantage of by disingenuous clients looking for a young girl to give them the world and offerring very little in return. I was in denial about being a "full on sex worker" just dabbling in the work without it feeling so transactional. I did meet some lovely clients along the way, but most, if I met now, would never get a booking. I didn't know my boundaries or worth back then, and they could smell it.

I look back now at some of the silly and potentially dangerous things I did in those baby worker days. I wasn't naive, but I certainly didn't know what I was doing straight away. A lot of clients took advantage, or tried to. There's no training for this line of work. And finding co-workers was difficult for a long time. What I would have given to just be able to talk to someone about it all. I couldn't talk to my friends or family, I dangled it for my psychologist at the time and the judgement across her face in that moment was enough to back pedal and lie that I was just thinking about it. So I just flew solo figuring it out on my own.

I worked a few months on weekends at a strip club, while juggling my role as a retail manager by day. It was good fun, but ultimately decided it wasn't for me. Those girls work HARD. The fitness required to work the pole, and the room, is immeasurable. While there was good money some nights, you really had to work for it. Walking around in heels all night, getting no dances and having to pay a house fee is one of the worst feelings ever. Selling yourself and showing your body to every person that comes through the door, pretending to desire these drunk and rude groups of people so you could go grind on them out the back for 15 minutes. Constant rejection and mean comments was more than my sensitive soul could handle. It just wasn't the right fit for me. I have so much respect for the woman that strip, it is a tough gig, mentally and physically, they really work so hard. I will never go to a club and not get a dance again.

I remember looking at the stunning women on websites like Scarlet Blue and thinking to myself gosh I would love to be like them. So classy and beautiful. I thought of myself as more of a girl next door type with messy blonde hair and a few tattoos, that I couldn't hold a candle to these stunners! Nonetheless, I set myself up with some nice lingerie and photoshoots with local photographers and couldn't believe how good the pictures turned out! I made myself a Scarlet Blue profile and started taking it a bit more seriously. The picture I've attached was from my first professional photoshoot! Gosh I was nervous! But today modelling comes second nature, it's so fun! I was juggling my job and being a single parent to my young son. I had a hobby business on the side. For several years I did everything I could so that I could support myself to spend as much time at home with my son as I could while we was little. As I got more bookings I was able to step down to casual at my retail job and spend more days going camping and bushwalking with him. Now that he is in school I am so proud of myself for what I achieved and the hours I was able to spend being a present mum. So for all my clients that were with me during that period I am eternally grateful.

Today, I am around 6 years in the industry. I've built a large base of clients both digitally and in person. They are very different jobs but I love both of them. I have also built a network of workers both locally and interstate that I can share the crazy highs and lows of this rollercoaster of a job with. I am grateful to be able to share with other women in the industry, and share my experiences with new girls. Strength definitely comes in numbers. Even though we are often in direct competition with one another I think it's more important to have each others backs. Unfortunately this industry is still so unregulated and there are so many predatory people both on the clients side and the workers side. Navigating this has been challenging. But I thinks that's all stories for another post!

Last year I was able to quit my regular job completely. I hadn't needed it for a long time, was down to one day a week but scared to cut the cord and rely on myself completely when the industry was so up and down. I remember mid last year going a few months without a single booking which was scary! Fast forward to this year and I decided to cut back on my other work/hobbies and really focus on sex work. It was bringing me the most joy and income so I wanted to focus my energy there while I was still young enough! (I think worrying about age now is silly BTW! I see women of all shapes, sizes and ages get booked!)

My favourite thing about this job is when I feel I can genuinely help people. A lot of my clients are lacking intimacy in their lives. I genuinely love being able to light that fire again for someone, even if it's only for a hour. It happens quite often that a client just wants a cuddle and someone to hold. It's not always about the sex. Don't get me wrong we won't skip the sex! But I think that connection and intimacy is important for everyone in this world.

I love getting a message after our booking hearing how good my client is feeling. I'm glad I can brighten someones day, or week, or however long it is they hold that feeling inside them.

Do I do this job because I have to? Short answer is NO. I do it because I want to. Can I get by without it? Absolutely. I think there is common misconception that we are forced into this line of work because we have no other options. I was doing just fine before starting Sex Work. If I wanted to stop tomorrow, I could. Sometimes clients message expecting someone desperate for a booking and willing to do anything for money. This is just not the case, for me personally anyway. I am have morals and boundaries just like anybody else. I enjoy sex and exploring with people. This does not mean I will do whatever you want for money, or that I will tolerate disrespect. I love my job and treat it like any other business. I keep calendars, have meetings, deal with enquiries, build websites, up skill, connect with peers, spend a lot of time and money on marketing, make content, track my expenses, pay my tax, just like anyone else. My product may be different to the every day business but to stick this out long term I need to see my income, have goals and achievements over a long period. I see a lot of peers in the industry treat it as fast cash, blow it on drugs, make up, clothes and other things. Which is fine, no judgment here! I just want more out of life. I want to buy another house and spend more time travelling the world with my son. Just live a good simple life that I didn't really have growing up.... and now my mind is thinking this may be a good Segway to my next blog post.... Travelling? My childhood? My goals? More about the industry? My content creation side of things?

Leave a comment below and let me know if you enjoyed reading this and what to write about next :)

Euphoria Xx